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Eating Smart: Three Stupid Ideas

Posted by kelvinbueckert on November 23, 2017 at 6:15 PM

Eating our words can be a challenge, especially if our promises are empty. You can feast all day on these empty calories and still end up hungry for something more. What can we do in these situations? Start drinking? Most experts now say that drinking a lot doesn’t really fill that empty hole, besides, drinking situations are usually fluid…and unpredictable. On the other hand, eating can lead to a full and happy life. How? As the winner of many eating contests (most notably, the Hunger Games) I am happy to share some of the insights that I have invented over the past few minutes. 1. WATCH WHAT YOU EAT…but not for too long otherwise your food will get cold. Believe it or not, if you watch your plate of food for long enough you’ll see mold start to grow on it. I learned this one the hard way. You don’t want this to happen to you. When its time, eat and be filled. 2. YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT so if you want to become someone of substance, you need to start feeding your mind and body things of substance. No more eating your own empty words! No more junk food! No more brain candy…or eye candy either! Out with the fluff and in with the other stuff! 3. EAT SMART: NO BACKBITING…its tasteless, especially the thick woolen sweaters people wear these days…not to mention its just plain weird to bite the backs of other people. The same principle applies to biting the hand that feeds you, waiters hate that. Believe me, I wouldn’t be writing these valuable tips from prison if I had learned this lesson sooner. So, in summary, when it’s time to eat, eat, if you want a healthy mind and body, feed yourself healthy things, and remember, no back biting…hand biting…or biting wit…

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